


Touching the Stars

by A_Modern_Girl



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Gen, Kathryn Janeway Needs a Hug, Starfleet Academy, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:54:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24299173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Modern_Girl/pseuds/A_Modern_Girl
Summary: What if Harry got to hug his captain before Endgame? Like,waybefore Endgame?  When Q is involved, anything is possible.
Relationships: Kathryn Janeway & Harry Kim
Comments: 12
Kudos: 44
Collections: Kathryn Janeway Needs A Hug





	Touching the Stars

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you [Caladenia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caladenia) for the lightening fast and thoroughly insightful beta. This one came together last minute and all remaining errors are mine. This story is dedicated to all the students still doing exams, essays, and coursework in the middle of a pandemic. You are amazing. Thank you [coffeeblack75](https://archiveofourown.org/users/coffeeblack75) for setting up this wonderful event!

Harry didn’t usually remember his dreams, but that night it was so vivid he knew he would be able to tell Tom about it in the morning. He was on Risa, lying on the beach. Libby was beside him, wearing nothing but a string bikini. Her brilliant smile was more beautiful than he remembered. Harry could almost feel the warmth of her body next to him, an unspoken promise of the pleasures to come. . .

The warmth was real. There was another body in his narrow Starfleet-issue bed. The hum of the ship meant he was nowhere near Risa, and there was no way he could be sharing a bed with Libby. His eyes snapped open, and the sight that greeted him repelled him so strongly he rolled onto the floor. He quickly recovered and threw up his hands in a fighting stance.

“Q? What are you doing here?” His voice trembling in spite of himself.

“I have a mission for you,” Q answered, smoothly rising out of bed.

“Well, I don’t follow your orders,” Harry replied, reaching for his commbadge.

Q snapped his fingers, and instead of feeling the cool metal, Harry found that he was tapping his shirt. He tried it again twice before lowering his hand. He looked at the clock: 0330. Much too early for this.

Q smirked at him. “Look, you don’t have to like me, but I thought you might be interested in saving your ship, the timeline, the future, and everything.”

Harry paused to inspect him carefully. Q was wearing a Starfleet uniform that was at least a decade out of date, maybe two. He sighed and gave in to his curiosity. “Tell me more.”

“Your old friend Braxton is at it again,” Q said.

"Captain Braxton, from the 29th century?" Harry asked.

"The very same," Q answered. "His goal is to prevent _Voyager_ from reaching the Delta Quadrant, to avoid his rather unpleasant exile on 20th century Earth. To that end, he’s trying to convince Captain Janeway to leave Starfleet.”

Harry couldn’t help but interrupt. “The captain? No way.” 

“Let me clarify. Not Captain Janeway. Cadet Janeway. When Braxton is catching up with her, she just flunked her temporal mechanics class. Ironic, really. She’s at a bit of a crossroads, so to speak. He believes that he can convince her to leave Starfleet, someone else will become _Voyager_ ’s captain, and via the butterfly effect, he will save himself from all that pain and trouble. However, since the dear captain played a critical role in obtaining peace for the Q Continuum, I cannot allow this to occur.”

“What do I have to do with this?”

“I need you to come back in time with me and convince your once and future captain to stay in Starfleet. A job so easy even you can handle it.” Q looked at him from top to toes and added: “I hope.”

Harry ignored the insult as best he was able. “Why me? I barely passed temporal mechanics myself. I pulled all-nighters for every exam!”

“And here I thought you humans loved a good underdog story,” Q snapped.

“Surely someone on this ship is more qualified than me!”

Q began pacing the room, listing off crewmen one by one, “Firstly, it would need to be someone from the senior staff, someone who knows her personally. Seven and Neelix are out right away. They would raise too many questions.”

“Makes sense, I suppose.”

“I also eliminated Torres and Paris; they’re dropouts, so they would be a bad influence.” 

“Hey-”

“Your doctor would talk her ear off. She’d probably leave Starfleet just to get rid of him.”

“Okay, that one I agree with.”

“That leaves you, Tuvok, and Chakotay. She meets Tuvok in two years in her future, so we can’t risk her remembering him. And can you imagine the chaos if she met Chakotay as a hormonal twenty-one year old?”

“I don’t know what you mean,” Harry replied, keeping his tone as light as possible.

“Sure you don’t,” Q purred, raising an eyebrow.

“You left out one person - you,” Harry noted.

Q’s shoulders sagged. “I am offering you a free trip to Earth, to go talk to a younger version of someone you converse with every day. And you’re still fighting me! Persuasion is not one of my stronger skills, and I’m man enough to admit it.”

The captain always said not to trust Q any further than one could throw him. However, the man did seem to be genuinely motivated. And even if it was a trick, giving a younger version of Janeway a pep talk could hardly make the timeline worse. Harry paused. His life would be much simpler if Braxton succeeded - Libby, a desk job, maybe a trip to Risa. But despite his own troubles with temporal mechanics, the course had gotten the point across: don’t change the timeline.

“I’ll do it,” he said, standing up a bit straighter.

A sly smile crept across Q’s face, and Harry almost changed his mind. Before he could take a breath, he heard a snap and then was blinded by bright daylight. When his eyes adjusted, he was standing on the quad at Starfleet Academy. The sun was out, the birds were singing - it had to be time for spring final exams. Harry spun around, and then looked down. His uniform matched Q’s, except for the rank insignia.

“An ensign? Still? Really?” he remarked.

“You need to be senior to her, but still approachable. That is, if you want this to work,” Q answered cheerfully.

Harry rolled his eyes, and in the process, he spotted Janeway. She was seated on a bench on the opposite side of the quad, next to Captain Braxton. Harry wondered why Braxton was wearing civilian clothes. The younger version of his captain became increasingly upset. Her shoulders were hunched, and he could see her lower lip trembling, even from that distance. Without meaning to, he growled, and stepped forward. Q grabbed him by the shoulders. 

“Not yet,” he hissed, “We can’t let Braxton know we’re here. If he knows he failed, he’ll try again some other time.”

Q motioned along the path, and the pair walked side by side. The gravel track would take them the long way around the quad, eventually reaching the bench where Janeway was sitting. Harry forced himself to look away, and focus on other things. The smell of the lilac bush they were passing. His footfalls, which didn’t resonate like they did on deck plating. It was good to be back, even if it was only for a little while.

“Thank you for bringing me here,” he told Q. 

Q looked at him with something approaching genuine warmth, and nodded. “Got your Starfleet recruiting speech ready to go?”

Harry almost tripped over his own feet. He had been so caught up by Q and by Earth that he hadn’t even considered how to approach his mission. Frantically, he thought of a few things to say, but nothing came to him. They rounded the corner and were headed straight for Janeway. As Harry watched, Braxton rose from his seat, and with a satisfied smirk, walked away in the opposite direction. His pace and demeanor indicated that his mission had been a success.

“Good luck,” Q said in a sing-song voice before turning off the path.

Harry wiped his clammy hands on his trousers as the seriousness of his assignment sank in. Cadet Janeway was cradling her head in her hands and showed no sign of leaving. Harry walked up and cleared his throat.

“May I sit down?” he asked lightly, indicating toward the bench.

“Sure,” Janeway replied, sounding miserable. “I won’t be here much longer anyway.”

“I wasn’t trying to steal your spot.” Harry said. “You kind of look like you’re having a rough time. Can I get you a cup of coffee?”

Harry mentally kicked himself. The captain never asked for his counsel on _Voyager_. She was always in control, her shields always up. What made him think that such a clumsy opening would work was beyond him. But then, to his great surprise, she nodded, and stood. He waved in the direction of the nearest coffee shop, a timeless campus favorite. Janeway fell into stride beside him.

“So, what’s your name?” she asked.

Harry tried not to flinch. Of course she didn’t know who he was. “Uh, Perry. Ensign Perry Lim. And you?”

She introduced herself as Katie Janeway, which forced Harry to smother a smile. As if he didn’t already know, he asked if she was Admiral Janeway’s daughter, which she confirmed. She asked him about his posting, and he scrambled to think of something reasonable. Luckily, they had just gotten to the front of the line at the coffee shop, and her question was forgotten. He didn’t want to waste time waiting for an espresso, so he got a regular coffee like hers, but doctored it heavily with soy milk.

“Thanks for the coffee,” Janeway said shyly. Was she batting her eyelashes at him?

“Uh, no problem,” He needed to get his mission back on track before he made a complete fool of himself. “So, what did you mean when you said you wouldn’t be here much longer? That sounded ominous.”

“I’m leaving Starfleet. I thought I was cut out for it, but obviously not.”

Harry indicated an empty table with a view of the bay. Selfishly, he wanted to soak up as much of Earth as he could. Then he reminded himself to focus. “Really? What makes you think that?”

He listened carefully as she told him the whole miserable story, asking for clarification and making encouraging noises where appropriate. As he would have expected, she had studied her heart out, but somehow, she had still failed the final exam in temporal mechanics. Her instructor had offered to let her retake the course over the summer, but she wasn't interested. That had to be because of Braxton, Harry thought.

“Who was that guy you were just talking to? He didn’t look like he was helping much.”

“That was Professor Braxton, a visiting professor from the Daystrom Institute. He said I was on the list of students he had been observing as candidates for their undergraduate program.”

“Why would that matter? You want to be in Starfleet right?”

“He told me that once you fail temporal mechanics, your chance of a shipboard assignment as a science officer is almost zero. Why should I bother staying in Starfleet if I won’t ever get to serve aboard a ship?”

“He seems to be making some pretty bold claims for someone who isn’t even in Starfleet,” Harry said, making a note to punch Braxton in the face if he ever got the chance.

“He’s right though. I failed. I failed. I should have gotten it right the first time.”

Harry couldn’t help but sigh. He had been a perfectionist too when he started at the academy, and he knew it was a hard habit to break. “I know how that feels,” he said softly. “It feels like crap. But that also means you are not the best judge of your own abilities right now.”

“I don’t know. Professor Braxton offered me a fellowship at the Institute. Apparently, their quantum cosmology program doesn’t require a temporal mechanics course.”

“Well, they do have a strong quantum cosmology program.” Harry said, the beginnings of an idea forming in his mind. “Some say it’s even better than Starfleet’s.”

“I guess,” Janeway replied with a shrug.

“And you’d never need to worry about temporal mechanics again.”

“That’s right.”

“You would be working with brilliant people. And hey, who needs to see the stars when you have the best instruments and equipment in the whole galaxy?”

“I suppose.”

They sat in silence for a moment, looking out at the hazy water in the distance.

“There’s this captain I’m serving under. Whenever I’m facing a tough decision, she would ask me: ‘what does your heart say?’” Harry asked, when he felt the time was right.

Janeway answered immediately, the words tumbling out. “That it’s not enough to study the stars. I need to see them with my own eyes, to get so close I could touch them. I need to fly. I need to explore. But it’s too late now.”

When he looked up, Janeway had tears in her eyes. It was jarring, but Harry wasn’t alarmed. For once, he knew exactly what he wanted to say.

“Look, I’m only an ensign. I haven’t been doing this all that long. But I can tell you, being a good starfleet officer? It isn’t about acing exams. Starfleet officers aren’t afraid of failure. They learn from it. They pick themselves up and try again and again."

Janeway was staring into her mug, a thoughtful frown on her face. Harry continued, "You are more than your grades. You are your hard work, your passion, your kindness. You can get through this. It will be hard, harder than anything you’ve done before, but one day you will get to touch the stars."

Harry held his breath. Janeway’s thinking face was exactly the same as the older version he was more familiar with. He could tell she was still having doubts.

“Still,” she said, “I already tried as hard as I could. What difference would it make to retake the class? Nothing’s going to change.”

“Based on what you told me, your only mistake was going it alone. This time, find a study group. That’s the other thing about Starfleet officers: they aren’t afraid of asking for help.”

“I’ll remember that.” she said with a solemn nod.

“So, you’ll give it a try?” Harry asked, trying not to sound too invested.

“I will,” she said firmly. Then she smiled, “My mother warned me that following my dreams would require sacrifice. I thought she meant staring at my books while my friends were at the bar. But I think she meant… this. Not giving up when the going gets rough. ”

It was time to go. Harry gathered their empty mugs with a quick smile and brought them back inside. When he returned, Janeway was waiting for him.

“Hey, Perry?” she asked with a small crooked smile.

“Yeah?”

Before he could process what was happening, Janeway had thrown her arms around him and was hugging him tightly. Harry wasn’t sure when, if ever, he would get a chance to embrace his captain again, and he gently hugged her back.

"Thank you," she said, "for the coffee and the advice. I hope I'll see you around."

"You will," Harry said warmly, "I promise."

They separated when he heard a cough beside them. Unsurprisingly, it was Q, wearing his trademark smug grin. “Ensign, there you are! We’re late.”

Janeway snapped to attention so fast Harry almost burst out laughing. If only the captain could see her younger self saluting Q.

“As you were, Cadet,” Q said severely, the irony not lost on him either.

They exchanged brief pleasantries, and then Q led him away. Harry flashed one more smile in Janeway’s direction and was quietly thrilled when she smiled back.

“Any idea if that worked?” he asked.

“Let’s find out!” Q said, snapping his fingers.

In a flash, Harry was back in his quarters on _Voyager_. “I guess it did!”

“And a good thing too, or we would have rematerialized in the vacuum of space,” Q said merrily.

Harry couldn’t tell if Q was joking or not, and decided he didn’t care. His work was done, and all he wanted to do was go back to sleep. He started searching for his pajamas, but froze when he saw the clock.

“It’s 0600! I’m due on the bridge! Why couldn’t you bring me back earlier?”

“Oh, I didn’t tell you? The amount of time that passed while we were on Earth needed to be the same as in the present, or Braxton would notice you were gone. Anyway, I best be on my way!”

Harry was still struggling to parse Q’s words when a bright flash left him alone in his quarters at last. He had no time to relish in his freedom, instead, he frantically assembled his uniform and ran for the turbolift. It was going to be a very long shift with no breakfast, but he didn’t have any other choice. He would have to sneak a message to B’Elanna and have her bring him something on the way to the daily briefing.

It was his bad luck that when he entered the bridge, the captain was standing at tactical, reviewing a schematic with Tuvok. Harry swallowed hard and took his post. Maybe their conversation was more interesting than his tardiness. His hopes were dashed when seconds later, a slight shadow fell over his console, and he found himself looking into the eyes of his captain.

“You’re late, Mr. Kim,” she said, eyes sparkling.

Harry knew this meant he was to be the subject of light teasing, both on the bridge and in the morning briefing. Normally, he didn’t mind the extra attention, but his nerves were still raw from jumping across the galaxy and across time.

“Sorry ma’am, rough night.” Janeway lifted an eyebrow, as if asking for more., “I dreamed I was back at the Academy, but years before I was there and…” He looked up and realized Janeway was staring at him. “It won’t happen again.”

Did she remember him from that day on campus, so many years ago? Whether she did or not, she surprised him by reaching out and gently squeezing his shoulder.

“See that it doesn’t,” she said, her stern words blunted by her gentle tone, “Why don’t I have Neelix send up some coffee?”

“That sounds great,” he said, relieved.

She nodded and made her way back to the command deck. “Do you still take your coffee with soy milk, Mr Kim?”

Harry started. Now when would she have noticed that? He looked up just in time to catch her winking at him. The coffee shop. She remembered.

“Uh yes, thanks.”

“And do try to be more on time in the future, Harry,” she said with a smile.

“Yes, Captain,” he replied, “You can count on me.”


End file.
